It's almost June 4, and that's when my classes will start.

Am I excited? No. Am I happy about starting classes again? Heck, no. Am I thrilled to see my classmates and my teachers again? Well, my classmates aren't really that nice and some of the teachers is my school is strict, so definitely not. All-in-all I am not happy about school. I am in no way delighted to being able to see everyone again and getting to socialize with them and other schist there is when it comes to school. Unfortunately, there's nothing I can do but go to school because that's where I'll be able to learn to get a good future. I'll be able to experience new things and meet semi-new people. So as much as I'm afraid of going to school, I guess I just have to face the fact that I have to do it. I have to attend school and get good grades, or just enough for my parents to be proud of me.

If only there weren't any backstabbers and bitches in school anymore, then I'd definitely enjoy attending school. /sigh If only. -.-

Welp, until my next entry. -Alice

I just came home from watching The Avengers with my family tonight.

Finally, after so many days of begging to them to let me watch it, I got to watch it tonight with my mom and dad. Mom thought she won't like the movie and will eventually fall asleep in the middle of it. Boy, was she so wrong. She stayed up all throughout the movie, watching and not even taking her eyes off the screen. It was that awesome. If someone were to ask me who my favorite character was, my heart would break little by little, because I wouldn't know what to answer. I just freaking love ALL of them! Hulk was awesome in smashing (lol). Black Widow was extremely amazing, considering she was a girl. The only girl. It just goes to show that girls can do just about anything a boy can. I love Hawkeye; he was so great at archery. Gods, I wish I could be like him! I hope there'd be an Avengers 2, where Loki would somehow change his ways and become good, and he'd for with the good and against the bad.

All-in-all, I pretty much enjoyed this night. It was super spectacular; I don't know how I'd even be able to sleep tonight. I guess that's just it. I won't be able to. I'll prolly just end up daydreaming about what I've just watched and never fall asleep until the next day.

Mom's telling me to turn off the laptop now, so I should really follow her orders.

Until my next entry. -Alice ♥

Because I was bored, I signed up on Polyvore.com and made this:

It doesn't look that good, but it doesn't look that bad either. I think the dress is really nice and all of the accessories I partnered it with. And yes, this is how my style looks like. At least it's how I want it to be, if only I had a lot of money to buy those pretty clothes and awesome jewelries and whatnot.

Now let me post about how much fun I had in Youth Camp last March 19-20, 2012.

First of all, I really enjoyed participating in that event. I joined because I thought that it would be great to experience something new and hopefully have fun and learn a lot of things. You know what? I did. The experience was amazing, inspiring, touching... Even until now I can't forget everything that happened when I was there. Never did I know that I would cry in Youth Camp. Yes, I cried. I cried a lot. But in the good way. I cried because I realized so many things that I didn't know would be a great impact in my life. An example is my brother. Because of that camp, I realized how important he was to me, and that as much as we fight and I scold him at times, I would still do everything to make sure he's okay. All along he was my weakness, the reason why I try to do my best and fight for what is right. I love my brother a lot, honestly. Even though I don't show it sometimes.

I also met a lot of awesome people. The Ate's and Kuya's were so welcoming and nice. There was this one ate, her name's Ate Chen. She's so bubbly and weird in a good way that I just want to know her better and become friends with her. Ate Shiela and Ate Remy were the ones who helped me to realize those certain things. They were the ones who helped me become a better person. Kuya Emman's so funny every time he cracks a joke I basically just laugh and laugh and laugh. There were a lot of amazing people in there, and I hope they know how thankful I am for them.

I also want to write about how happy and giddy I was for seeing the guy I like in there but I'm afraid that someone would find out and tell him about it and then he'll start ignoring me and we won't be friends and I would die alone and lonely with 83 cats so yeah okay I'll just stop here.

LOL. Welp, until my next entry. -Alice ;) :))

An old mansion with a secret.

I think my dream started when I was at home. Nothing peculiar, just me playing computer like always. It was only me, my mom and my brother at home since my dad had a business trip in another country. Skip, skip, skip... Later on, mom got a mail saying we've got free tickets to go on a vacation to somewhere, only I can't recall where it was. When we got there, an old woman escorted us to a room where apparently, my dad was waiting for us. We hugged and stuff like that... Somehow I felt like there was something wrong with the place, like there was a different aura about it that was dangerous and harmful. There were other people in there as well, boys and girls who were of my age; they seem to have been invited to this weird ancient-like mansion just like my family and I. Also, I was roomed with 3 girls; luckily, they were nice to me. They looked flirty, but in truth they were just like me, only better-meaning more beautiful, whiter, lesser no pimples, etc. I told them about what I was feeling, and they said that they were feeling the same. That was when I decided to investigate a little about the place. I asked the old woman who owned the mansion about its history, and she told me that this house is haunted by a girl who died in here. I asked her a few other questions, then left.

The next few days, things started to get strange. People were mysteriously disappearing out of nowhere, and no matter how hard we try to find them, we couldn't. We wondered where they all could've gone, then I remembered. The mansion was haunted. I told myself that maybe this was the girl's doing, making people disappear and things like that. But why would she do such a thing? We weren't doing anything bad. Later in my dream, I learned a very bad news: Hypnos was dying. Correction: he was already dead. I, myself, have no idea why Hypnos, the god of sleep, would be in my dream, dead and lifeless. It was weird, too. Like, how on Earth would a god die? They're all immortal, aren't they? It was a question I never successfully got the answer. Anyway, I went to the room where Hypnos was lying down. When I saw him, I felt pity for him. He looked so pale and blue, like all of his blood was drenched out of his body. He was really big too, like all gods and goddesses should be. Dad was trying to cure him, but he was too late. The old woman started crying. I asked why, and she told me that she didn't tell me the whole truth about the house. The truth was the girl was her daughter and that she died in this room. I can't recall how she died, unfortunately. I tried to calm her down, saying that it was okay and that at least she told the truth. I told her to get some fresh air and leave the room for a while. She did what I told her to do and left, still crying a bit. Suddenly, I hear screaming. I looked out to see what was going on and saw one of the old maids shouting. The old woman went to the maid's aid and followed her. What I saw terrified me.
Zombies, I thought.
There were zombies in the house. What's worse is that the zombies were the people who disappeared and never came back. They were heading towards us, and my heart started to pound fast and loud. I ran towards the other door saying, "Mom, dad, we gotta go!" I got out and saw the zombies still following me. I ran to the very end-now I had no escape. I had no choice but to jump out of the high balcony and hopefully land safely in the grass below. I jumped high away from the house and the evil zombies, and before I knew it, I was awake.

I know it's past 12 midnight, but I'm busy learning on how to play Safe and Sound by Taylor Swift on the piano.

And guess what? I did it! Thanks to a video tutorial in Youtube on how to play the whole song, I was able to learn the intro, since that's what I've been finding hard to do all this time. But now, I am able to play it, and I feel so proud of myself for doing so. You see, I've always wanted to be able to play this song since it always makes me cry when I listen to it in my phone. Being able to play it is like an accomplishment to me; I feel like I've achieved what I wanted to do, and now I'm happy.

I think I'm going to study Kingdom Come by The Civil Wars next, since I find the song really mesmerizing and the way they sung it was just... ugh. So beautiful, man.

Anyway, good night (or good morning?).

Until my next entry. -Alice

I downloaded new songs tonight.

The songs are:

• We Are Young - Fun
• Kingdom Come - The Civil Wars
• Payphone - Maroon 5
• Somebody That I Used To Know - Gotye (downloaded the Glee version tho)
• Call Me Maybe - Carly Rae Jepsen

Time for a semi-new playlist yay! :D :)

A while ago, I played the piano in our village church.

And even if there was a hint of nervousness while I was playing, I have to say I was still quite spectacular.

I really think that I did a good job on playing tonight. With the help of God, I was able to become more confident than last Friday, when I played in the mass as well but had not much confidence (it's probably because I didn't get to pray out of nervousness). Tito Ruel, my mentor and an amazing pianist, smiled at me every after I played a song. It was a kind of smile that says, "I am proud of you." After the mass, mom congratulated me for being able to play. Others told me things like, "Ang galing mo! Pwede mo na palitan si Tito Ruel mo!" All their compliments flattered me a lot; it made me a bit proud of myself. I remember Tito Ruel saying, "Ang lakas talaga ng loob ni Lala!" That was really nice. I smiled a lot when he said that.

Well, I am pretty proud of myself. I'm sure God is proud of me as well.

I am feeling sao depressed.

My friend says I'm not really that depressed since I'm still eating (I don't eat when I'm depressed), but somehow I still feel my heart shrinking and my mind blowing because of what happened yesterday. I can't stop thinking about it and I feel like I want to cry and just curl into a ball at a corner and die. Honestly, it wasn't much of a big incident, and I don't know why I keep being so emotional about it. My hormones are everywhere and I can't seem to get them back.

I'm probably just too attached. Maybe, just maybe, if I leave immediately I won't have to think and stress about it anymore. I won't have to see it and cry about it and be depressed and all that schist. I won't have to make it as a problem anymore since I'm gone. Forever. *le sigh* If only it was that easy. If only it was so easy to leave that place; but it's hard. It's where I met so many awesome new friends, learned a lot of cool stuff, got comforted when I was depressed; it's where I actually felt like I had a family. It's hard to leave them just like that when you know you've had so many good memories with them. How I wish it was that easy, but it's not.

Oh, well. I just have to think hard about it, I guess.

I had a semi-weird dream last night.

So last, last night, I made this playlist on my phone. In that playlist, I added songs that was sung by boys, and basically, it was like a 'romantic' kind of playlist. There were songs like Two Is Better Than One-Boys Like Girls, Statue-Lil Eddie, What If-Jason Derulo, and many more. I slept while listening to that playlist last night, and because of that, I dreamt of this:

I was in a resort. I don't know where it was; all I know was that it had pools and beaches, cabins and huts, stuff that you usually see in a real resort. With me was a guy; I couldn't quite distinguish who he was, but he was tall, semi-curly brown hair, and I think he was a bit slim too. We were hanging out a lot in there, and honestly, it looked like we were legit together in my dream. He was so sweet and romantic (not to mention, hot)... He was this sort of guy you see in movies where he falls for the simple, weird girl. I was attracted by him a lot-even until now, when I'm fully awake, I can't stop thinking about him. What's weird about this dream is that the guy was so good to me. No guy has ever been good to me, ever. In fact, I don't think guys like that exist anymore. Which sucks is that they'll only exist forever in my dreams, and not in my reality.

Okay, so maybe there is that one guy in this whole planet who I'll meet and will eventually fall in love with me, yada, yada, yada. But for now, I think I'll stick with fictional characters and famous actors. ;)

xoxo,
Alice. :3

So I'll just shamelessly leave all of these pictures here because of reasons.

I MISS MY FRIENDS SO MUCH I CAN'T-

(p.s. I don't have all of my friends' pictures because idk omg D: )

I haven't been dreaming much since the past few days.

I guess that's because I hardly sleep comfortably anymore. Usually, I sleep during 2-3am. My latest was 4am; I was watching a show I can't recall. But, yeah. I stay up all night everyday and wake up during noon, when lunch is ready. I, myself, believe that I have a very f-ed up sleeping pattern. Ever since summer started I began sleeping like this. But no matter what I do to sleep, I can't. I guess you can say I'm an insomniac; I can't sleep during the night, no matter how hard I try. I should read articles about that sometime.

Although I did have a dream a while ago. Do you know the show in ABS-CBN called Dream High? (I think that's a Korean show or something) Anyway, my dream was placed in a school that looks like the one in that show. Even our uniforms looked exactly like the students! Not that I'm complaining; their uniforms are really cute. :3 Back to my dream; I was walking towards the green lockers like those in the show. There was this girl who was bullying me, and I was only like, "Yeah, whatevs." She got down to tie her shoes, then I kicked her bag, causing her things to fall everywhere. And I left. The end.

On another note, it's dad's outing today together with his workmates! They're going to... wait for it... Enchanted Kingdom! XD I teased my dad about that last night. Good thing he didn't get pissed or else I would've gotten in trouble! LOOOOOOL. Poor dad. Oh, well. He might enjoy his trip in EK. We'll never know, right? :D

So I'm a bit frightened because until now, I still haven't decided on what course I'll be taking in college.

I used to want to be an actress or an author or a singer or a musician. I'd move to New York and become famous in Hollywood, meet people more famous than I am, party with my fans, meet the guy of my life, get married, live in a spacious home in a peaceful town with our three lovely children: Alice, Anastasia, and a boy I haven't named yet.

But those were the days when I could still dream about how amazing my future would be and how someday I would become very successful at the things I do. Now, I'm an incoming third year high school, and I still haven't found the right course for me to study on when I go to college. Mom says I should just pick a course where I know I'll make a lot of money. She doesn't understand. I don't want to pick a course where I know I won't enjoy. I believe in the saying, "Choose a job that you love, and you'll never have to work a day in your life again." I want to choose a course where I'll be able to learn and at the same time enjoy. And when time comes when I'll have to choose a job, I'll choose the one I'm most certain I'll enjoy in. I tried to base my course on my talents and skills; unfortunately, the only talent I have playing the piano and eating. Where's my future in that? You'll only become famous in the piano if you're as good as Yiruma, Beethoven or Mozart. And I've seen people in Youtube play the piano far better than I ever could. And it's not the insecurity talking right now. And eating? Please. That's not even a real talent! You know what that means? I have no future! I'll die alone with no work and with my 83 cats! While my brother is prolly busy signing autographs in peoples' papers, I'll be alone in my apartment, doing nothing but breathe and eat and sleep and pretty soon die out of loneliness and depression! Gaaaaaah!

Okay. So I may have exaggerated a little bit. But I'm just saying. I'm afraid terrified of the future. Very, very terrified, indeed. I don't know what my future looks like, but I hope there's a bit good in it. And with this, I say goodbye.

Until my next blog entry. -Alice

Happy Alice is happy.

My vacation was great! We stayed at one of the resorts in Lian, Batangas. Their beach was so nice; it had white sands, the water was clean despite the seaweeds and rocks, and all-in-all I had an awesome time! We took a lot of pictures, although I can't possibly fit them all in here, so I'll just post some of our pictures yay! ^^

This was the house we stayed in while we were in Lian, Batangas. It has 3 bedrooms with air-condition and comfort rooms. The living room was nice, too. It gave that sort of authentic, non-modern sort of feel in the house. :)

This was one of the pictures I took. I love how I captured the sun just before it totally set down. Dad loves this picture because "it shows serenity and peace", something like that. 

It's my name (kind of)! I wrote it on the sand using a stick. :D

Yay group picture! This was taken during the night time. As you can see a bit slightly, there's a bottle of Tanduay Ice on the table. My cousins are drinking (don't worry, they're of legal age) while I'm just sitting around and stuff. Lol I'm just kidding I drank a bit of T. Ice too. But it's because they wanted me to! Omg don't kill me D:

P.S.: The beer tasted... awful! It's like softdrinks, but worse. ._.

Day 2 of our fabulous outing! It's me and my family posing under the sun. :3

Another group picture! Not everyone's in the picture; some weren't swimming and were only in the house.

It's me with my mom and my grandma! In this picture, we're going boating to another island far away from where we currently were. Well, not really that far, but if you try to walk to it then yes, it is really far.

Another pretty picture that I took! *proud lol* In this picture, we are already on the other island. The sand is really nice; the water was nice too, I guess. Just minus the seaweeds floating everywhere in the water. XD This island is actually private property, so that's why it's still really clean and pretty. 

That's just me, swimming around and having fun. ^_^

Jellyfishes! :3 My aunt and my dad got those for me and said I could keep them. Awesome, right? But of course, as sweet as a little girl I am (lolno), I took pity for the sea creatures and decided to let them go. Not sure where they are now, but I hope they got away safe and sound. :)

When we got home from Laguna, all of us were so hungry when a fishball,etc. cart passed by everybody just came to it and ordered a lot of chickenball and fishball. Also, the ride to our home was basically 3 1/2 hours (i know, it's so far omg) without food or anything. 

After eating, they went back to their car and traveled back to Taytay. And that's where our vacation ends. awwww